Tuesday, April 28, 2009

One Thing (or Two) I learned from Rope-Pulling Competition

"We are judged by what we do and how we do it... no matter how small and insignificant that thing might be."

Yes, I believe in that sentence. How we do something determines how we do everything in life. How we treat waiters in the restaurant, how we act on our appointments including casual dinner with friends, and how we say thank-you to the auntie cleaners (or maybe, no thank-you at all, or maybe we are wondering "hey, how come the floor is always clean without any people cleaning it?" gee..)

For me, I always finish whatever I start, and I mean, finish well.

Last Sunday we had "Rope Pulling Competition" or whatever they call it in English. I signed up for it, and if that competition were a Champions League match, I won't be the Lionel Messi or Cristiano Ronaldo. I train hard in the gym, but yeah, maybe I am not genetically muscular, so, well. To make the long story short, I am noone in that competition.

Except for one thing....

I never give up. I always enter a competition with one thing in mind: I am going to win. I give my best (and maybe my best is not enough, but who.bloody.CARES?).

We won our first two matches and we entered the top 6 out of 24 teams. That is quite an achievement if we look at our team: all Asians, noone is particularly big and muscular.

Even when we finally lose to the team who finally topped the whole competition, we lose with our face straight looking at our teams' eyes: proud and satisfied...

And as for me, I know myself too well. When I had a 2-hour non-stop badminton match, I will run for 2 hours. I will catch the shuttlecock wherever it goes even when I need to fall down and get hurt, that's perfectly alright. So whenever I finish something, be it a badminton match or a Rope Pulling competition; be it an exam or a job; be it a 1/2-million-dollar project or a simple speech, I always tap myself on my shoulder, and tell myself:

"Ben, I am so proud of you.Really, Really Proud"


Happy Birthday Regina...

You two are one of the sweetest couples I have ever met (Tom and Katie Cruise not included :D)

Saturday, April 18, 2009


There might be times when we felt that no matter how hard we tried, our society just can't accept us. In 23 years of my life, I have seen countless of so-called good boys or girls who turned naughty just to be accepted by their community. Some tried too hard to be popular, and some who failed finally had to rely on shortcuts like free sex and drugs.

And I know how it feels. I come from a family which is 100 miles from being harmonious, and I know how important the feeling of acceptance is. And given that kind of background, it's perfectly reasonable for me to turn into that kind of people, who are dying just to be accepted.

I know how it feels to have to depend on sleeping pills just to be able to sleep. I perfectly understand how it feels when troubles seem so big that jumping from the 6th floor of university dormitory seems to be the easiest and the least painful way.

Given the kind of acting ability, despite all the troubled past, I was able to hide all the problems behind my back, faking my smile, and appeared that I am the most blessed and problem-free person. Sometimes I didn't only have double personality syndrome, I had many - so many until I lost count. And let me tell you, we can pretend well at some occasions. We can pretend not-so-well at many occasions. However, pretending well at all occasions is just so freaking tiring - something that I did for more than 1 year, perfectly well.

And if not because of God's grace, maybe I had already given up my dream. However, I continued to pursue it, doing lots of things other probably could only dream of - graduating from one of the best universities in Asia, getting multiple job offers long before I graduated, and many other things (read my previous posts).

And I have just realized.. some people try too hard to be accepted. Maybe I tried the hardest... failed, injured, and was left disappointed.
If I were to learn from the mistakes, I would conclude my post with this very beautiful quote:

"God, give me the strength to change the things I can change, the courage to accept the things I can't change, and the wisdom to know the difference."

Some things in life are better left untouched.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Just because I am no longer 18...

When I was 18 years old, everything seems to happen so slow.

When I am 23, everything seems to be too fast. And when I look back, I always wonder "What the heck have I done for the past 5 years?"
This morning I read China Daily and read that a 22-year-old college student from Wisconsin USA was elected as city mayor. And realizing that I am 1 year older than him and have accomplished nothing in life left me feeling so useless.

However, when I reflected back.. let's say I can live until 80 years old. The journey I have done so far is just over a quarter of it. If my life were a football match, it is not even half-time and for most football matches I watched, the first half of the match is boring. Manchester United scored twice in the last few minutes when they won their Champions league in 1999 and when they won it again last season, the last few minutes period was also the decision factor.

Nevertheless, I think life is short and if I imagine in the last few minutes of my life, I will be asking questions like whether I am satisfied with the life I have.

Maybe I am no longer 18 not even close to that, but I think, never in my life I am feeling so energized. Never in my life I want to (once-again) conquer the world. And never in my life I am feeling so blessed to have some of the finest things in life which can't be bought by money, and some which can be bought by money.

Maybe I am no longer 18, but who.bloody.cares.

P.S. :
1.Friends, thanks for a meaningful 23th birthday.

2. I am going to have a blog in Chinese. Do leave a message or send me an E-mail to suggest for the URL name of my chinese blog :)

3. Some of the finest things in life are FREE. One of those is salvation. Jesus Christ has died for us sinners so we can be saved. Happy Easter and may the spirit of Easter reminds us that we are indeed very, very blessed.